Unfortunately, there are many reasons for tears, especially for women. There are times when crying is not even a sin at all, but on the contrary – an emotional release. But it happens when tears, especially in front of others, cause aggression or can simply harm the cause. How to learn to hold back tears in such situations and learn not to cry when you really want to?
Tears, as a rule, appear when the body experiences a strong emotional shock caused by external stimuli. In this case, the first thing you need to do is switch your attention.
For example, the threat of danger that motivates action distracts a person from self-pity and mobilizes forces for protection. What needs to be done to quickly cause such a reaction?
To hold back tears, pinch yourself discreetly, bite your lip or tongue. Painful sensations will instantly return you, as they say, to the ground and you will not want to cry. Just don’t overdo it, so as not to harm your health and not frighten those around you with blood flowing down your chin.
Another way to learn not to cry in a difficult situation is to calmly, deep breathing nose. As soon as tears come, take a deep breath in through your nose and exhale slowly through your mouth. Similar breathing exercises used by yogis, psychologists and anyone who wants to achieve peace and harmony or learn to control anger and tears.
The method of switching attention is also very effective. At the moment when you want to cry, think about something completely unrelated or start looking at the objects around you down to the smallest detail. To hold back your tears, you can also count to ten or twenty, remember the words of a song or poem, and finally, you can read a prayer.
How to learn to hold back tears if there are people nearby who are capable of sympathy and you are sure that they will feel sorry for you? It’s very simple, try not to be distracted by them. Because just one look at the expression on such a person’s face will not leave a single chance to hold back your tears.
And despite various situations, do not forget that tears are important element in a person’s life, which is both psychological and physiological. Tears can be removed toxic substances from the body and relieve emotional stress.
Moreover, if you are an impressionable person prone to melancholy, you should not hold back your crying. At the very least, having dealt with the situation with dignity, retire and pay off everything that has accumulated.
How to hold back your tears when you really want to cry
Every morning, standing in front of the mirror and looking into your eyes, repeat that you are strong, smart, that you are really better than everyone, that you are not afraid of anything or anyone, that you will be able to overcome absolutely all life’s obstacles.
You can withstand any suffering, no one will break your will or force you to bow to anyone. In this way, you will instill desire and confidence in yourself, become stronger, and no tears or sobs will overcome you, you will be able to look at yourself from a different perspective and draw certain conclusions.
However, each medal has reverse side. As already mentioned, crying is a surge of emotions, and emotions need to be given free rein from time to time, in other words, “let off steam.”
In case of urgent need, when you cannot understand what to do, if you want to cry, it is better to retire, cry alone or turn to to a loved one who will listen to you and treat you with understanding. Speak out, share your impressions, ask for advice. If you cry all your tears, it will become much easier.
Possible damage or speck
If your eyes are watering uncontrollably and this is not associated with any emotional experiences, you should carefully examine the mucous membrane. Perhaps there is damage or speck on it that does not cause the feeling of the presence of something foreign, but the eyes are watery. Try rinsing your eyes with cool water; if the tearing persists, consult an eye doctor.
Inflammation
Tearfulness is sometimes the cause of inflammation in the eyes. Bacterial, viral, fungal and other infections are accompanied by tearing. In this case, you should immediately contact an ophthalmologist, who will prescribe eye drops containing antibiotics. It is not recommended to use such drops on your own.
Allergy
How to stop tears if they are caused allergic reaction. Here, as in the previous paragraph, you should either consult a doctor (if this is the first time) or take antiallergic medicine on time.
Tears from onions
To learn not to cry when cutting onions, you need to first wet the knife and onion with cool water. The substance that causes tears dissolves in water and does not enter the air, preventing tearing.
Tearfulness due to eye fatigue
Increased tearfulness due to eye fatigue can be relieved with compresses made from tea leaves. Soak cotton swabs in the tea leaves and apply to your eyes for fifteen to twenty minutes before going to bed. This procedure also helps with minor inflammatory process.
Emotional tears
It is difficult to stop tears caused by emotional experiences. If something serious has happened and the tears tearing out are practically choking you, don’t hold them back, cry and let the negativity out. If we are talking about resentment, insult or other conflict, in order to hold back the tears, try to sharply switch your thoughts and remember something good. These manipulations will distract you from what is happening and you will be able to restrain the outburst of emotions.
We are all very different and react differently to events happening in the world around us. Some people are practically indifferent to everything, while others, when any stressful situation immediately burst into tears. Meanwhile, crying in front of friends, colleagues or strangers is always unpleasant. So how to hold back tears in a situation where showing them to your interlocutors is highly undesirable?
To control tears, discreetly pinch yourself on the inside of your thigh or another particularly sensitive area of skin. Pain is always of paramount importance to the brain, which means this trick will help you easily isolate yourself from the cause of your tears. The main thing is not to overdo it and not cause an attack of tears provoked by pain.
To hold back your tears, remove yourself from the situation: realize that you allegedly forgot about this or that important and urgent matter and hastily leave.
Try to hold your breath for a while. By concentrating on it, you can easily stop the attack of tears and take your emotions under strict control.
Bite it lower lip. This trick is somewhat similar to the first proposed method, and is aimed at “deceiving” the body, refocusing its attention on painful sensations. The main thing is not to leave marks on the lip and not to bite it until it bleeds.
Think in advance about what thoughts can distract you from the current situation at a critical moment. Alternatively, these could be memories of one or another pleasant, positive event, or attempts to solve pressing, pressing everyday problems. To hold back tears, try to solve several problems at once or try mentally reciting favorite poem, sing lines from your favorite song, remember the multiplication table.
If you have the opportunity, make several sharp, intense movements.
Concentrate your attention on a particular object located in the distance and begin to study it most carefully. The main thing is not to look into the face of a person who can make you cry. If it is difficult to avoid looking directly at him, then try to mentally laugh at him. Think about the bully's ridiculous habits or imagine him dressed in a ridiculous clown costume.
Now you know how to hold back tears in the right situation. However, do not use the above techniques constantly: psychologists say that tears are the best way of psychological release and physiological protection from stress.
We are all very different. And we react differently to everything around us. It’s impossible to knock even a tear out of some, while others just burst into tears. Both have their drawbacks. Crying for any reason, and even in front of strangers, co-workers, friends, is quite unpleasant.
On the other hand, it is impossible to go through all problems “dry”, as this can lead to mental stress and deterioration of health. Let's try to figure out how to learn to hold back tears.
Often crying people, sometimes get into awkward situations when tears begin to flow like a river, and even at the wrong moment. For example, the boss shouted, the teacher made a stern remark during class, they were rude in public transport.
And now they have a lump in their throat, their voice trembles treacherously, and tears roll into their eyes. But you really don’t want to cry and show your weakness in front of strangers! But the tears don’t care about this, they flow on their own. This makes it even more offensive and makes you want to burst into tears.
These are very effective ways to hold back tears in the right situation. But don’t try to stop crying completely, as psychologists say that sometimes crying is even beneficial.
Tears are a type of psychological release and a physiological defense against stress. Therefore, you don’t need to hold back your tears all the time. You don’t have to feel embarrassed to cry while watching a sad movie or a tragic story on the news.
Even if we quietly shed a small tear, this is considered a small but necessary release. But when we cry very hard, we take active deep breaths and exhales. Thanks to this, we throw off all the negativity at the physiological level. If this does not happen, we will create psychopathic clamps that lead to radiculitis and osteochondrosis.
Immediately after the baby is born, the first thing the mother hears is the baby’s cry. A baby can cry for any reason if he does not know how to say - this is his first reaction to difficulties or a traumatic situation.
In adulthood, it is generally accepted that crying is shameful, especially for men, crying is a sign of weakness, and similar statements. But when experiencing difficult losses, the loss of loved ones and something valuable, tears appear on their own. Some people have hypersensitivity to everything that happens, so for them the urgent question is how to stop crying over little things, how to restrain their emotions.
Crying is an automatic emotional process needed to provide relief after prolonged stress. Sometimes even after physical activity, as if out of the blue, the person begins to cry.
Crying in small quantities is acceptable and is considered normal. Especially after psychological trauma, psychologists advise not to suppress emotions within yourself, but to bring them out through crying. In such cases they say: “Cry, it will become easier.” But the process of uncontrollable crying, which often occurs, is considered pathological. This indicates a person’s psychological or mental problems.
In fact, there are many reasons for constant crying, from physiological to mental. But still, how to stop crying when the tears flow at the wrong time?
It is important for a person to learn to control his emotions, because others will consider him an unbalanced person.
When you feel a lump in your throat, tears coming to your eyes, and you can’t cry at the moment, the method of calming down with deep breathing will come to the rescue.
You need to repeat this 5 times. If there is intense crying, this method is not used, as it can lead to hyperventilation.
Deep breathing allows you to reduce the heart rate, while improving the delivery of oxygen to the cells, reducing the intense subjective understanding of the traumatic situation.
During periods of uncontrollable emotions, you need to analyze positive and negative thoughts. When a person realizes that he is burdened by specific situation, half of the solution to the problem has already been done.
In moments of grief or loss, a person tends to think about his loneliness and hopelessness. These feelings are so strong that they can cause crying for months. When a person feels hopelessness, he loses the meaning of life. Constant crying is replaced by emptiness and the meaninglessness of one’s existence. But in such a state it is usually difficult to analyze anything. Therefore, the following method comes to the rescue.
The best psychotherapy for fear is drawing, and the same with crying: the best psychological treatment crying - recording your feelings or emotions. Each entry is separate.
When you experience any kind of stress, it is important to learn to abstract yourself from it. What does it mean? Peace of mind is not restored the first time. Pessimistic thoughts often occur, but if you try to distract yourself from them, you can soberly assess the situation. How to get distracted?
When a lump comes to your throat and you want to cry, it is important to set yourself up for the positive: this situation will pass someday, all the bad things will not last forever. To sober up a little, you can wash your face with cold water.
People cry from the very first day of life - this is our body's natural reaction to stress. The reason for tears is a feeling of deep grief, resentment, disappointment. Pity and compassion, a sense of pride and sincere joy can also cause tears. Psychologists agree that crying is healthy. However, there are situations in life when crying means losing, showing your weakness, vulnerability. What to do when you need to restrain yourself at any cost, you will learn from this article.
Women are often called crybabies. Yes, our mobile psyche reacts to any emotional shock. We cry from overwhelming feelings. Tears are necessary. They help cope with stress and extinguish negative emotions. Tears of sympathy are especially useful for us, as they heal not only our body, but also our soul.
But there are situations when you can’t cry.
Here are some of them:
In such a situation, you absolutely cannot cry. Why? little child tears evoke pity and attract attention. Having cried, he gives a signal: I am weak, have pity on me. During an exam, crying will most likely cause a backlash. She’s crying, which means she doesn’t know anything, didn’t teach her, and is trying to make her feel sorry for her.
To be on equal terms with the teacher, you need to show that you are an adult and know how to restrain yourself.
There is no doubt that there are a lot of situations in which you need to restrain yourself. You have encountered them many times. How can you hold back the tears that come at the wrong time and control your emotions?
If tears are already welling up in your eyes and you definitely need to hold them back, you can mentally ask yourself one of the following: the following questions: “Did I turn off the iron?”, “Are my neighbors flooding me?”. Psychologists call these questions "adrenaline". A sharp release of adrenaline into the blood will change your emotions, and you will not cry.
Imagine your offender in a funny and absurd way.
Or try "substitution method"- you are the boss, and the boss is you. How many kind words would you tell him? The main thing here is not to overdo it. Loud laughter in such a situation is also inappropriate.
If you're about to cry physical reason: your eyes are watering from fatigue, there is dust or debris, you are allergic to strong odors, then these measures will not help you. In this situation, the best way out is to apologize and try to eliminate the cause of the tears. Take your medications, wash your eyes, get some fresh air.
To prevent a negative mood after an unpleasant conversation from haunting you all day, take emergency measures:
If you cry very often at the slightest reason and find it very difficult to hold back your tears, consult a doctor. You may have health problems. It could be stress chronic fatigue, thyroid diseases.
Tears help relieve tension inside, give vent to depressing emotions, and in many situations it is even very useful to cry. However, there are times when shedding tears is a sign of emotion, vulnerability, or weakness, which means losing. But how to hold back your tears and not cry when you want to be alone, but there is no such opportunity. What to do if there is a lump in your throat? How can you still restrain yourself and not give free rein to your emotions? Let's look at a few steps that can solve this problem.
How to hold back your tears if your boss gave you an undeserved “brain drain.” You shouldn't feel sorry for yourself, it's better to get angry at her. You can redirect the pain from yourself to the offender. If you are offended by one specific person, then you need to mentally transfer your emotions to him. Or she may even find something to feel sorry for her for (the haircut is unsuccessful, menopause is coming, her nerves are frayed). You can also play with your imagination. Mentally turn the offender into a croaking frog, with a trash can on his head, imagine him in a clown costume, or imagine that he is a crow. The main thing with imagination is not to overdo it, otherwise you might not be able to restrain yourself and laugh in your face.
Tears are water, and water is attracted to water. Therefore, after a heated conversation, drink water or tea. In order not to shed tears immediately after a difficult conversation, it is better to drink half a glass of water or other liquid, for example, not hot tea, slowly and in small sips. As if washing away an insult, it is quite easy to hold back tears if you completely wash your face with cool water or wipe your entire face with a damp cloth. To further consolidate the result, and so as not to cry after, we do this. As quickly as possible, we are distracted by any matter not related to the one that almost brought us to tears.
In life, situations often arise when emotions overflow and you want to cry. However, not everyone wants to do this in public. For this reason, you need to hold back your tears, but not everyone can do this. But there are ways that will help you do this, you just need to pull yourself together and remember them in a stressful situation.
Some people take great pleasure in humiliating others in order to become more important. They just like to see others cry because it makes them feel superior. Most often, sensitive people become their victims. In this case, they need to try to respond with rudeness to rudeness. However, in a stressful situation it is quite difficult to fight back. For this reason, tears appear in the eyes. How not to cry in this situation? The most the best way here you will hurt yourself. You can, for example, dig your nails into your hand or bite your cheek. Such actions allow you to divert your attention from the problem and the desire to cry will immediately disappear. You can also pull out a few hairs or pull on your ear. What is important here is not so much the action as the moment of distraction.
Also in a good way not to cry in public is a mental representation of your offender in a comical situation. So, for example, you can put a bucket of slop or garbage on his head. As a result, he will not look stern; on the contrary, he will want to laugh. In addition, he can be dressed in rags or completely undressed. The choice is really wide, the main thing is to practice a little and at a crucial moment, instead of wanting to cry, you will want to laugh. If a person is constantly brought to tears, then this can be done, since this act will discourage him. While listening to offensive things from a spiteful critic, you can mentally throw water, slop, paint, and mud at him. This way, you will be able to distract yourself from his words, and they will not be so offensive.
Many people have the habit of crying at weddings and birthdays, because they are overwhelmed with joyful emotions and in this way a person gives them a way out. Of course, no one blames you for this, but the makeup of the fair sex after tears leaves much to be desired. In this case, you should remember how much time it took, then all the desire to cry will disappear. If tears appear, then you should leave and look at yourself in the mirror. An unsightly appearance will frighten any girl, so she will immediately stop crying.
To avoid crying at an important event, you should remember to breathe. As soon as emotions begin to overwhelm, you need to take a few deep breaths. It's best to go outside to breathe fresh air, a few minutes will be enough. While inhaling it, you need to imagine how calmness enters the body, and with each exhalation, excitement and the desire to cry go away.
A cigarette helps some people hold back their tears. So, when emotions begin to overwhelm and you want to cry, you need to light a cigarette. One cigarette will be enough. You should not abuse this method, as it will not benefit your health. It is important to know that smoking shifts consciousness from one subject to another, so in this case psychologists advise drinking a glass of wine or water. The main thing is for the brain to switch to another object. You can even go out and eat something, even if it’s just ordinary candy.
All the above methods prevents you from crying public places. However, when a person is alone at home and wants to shed a tear, you should not hold back your emotions. According to psychologists, crying is good for you. This is explained by the fact that a person needs to give vent to his emotions, and should not accumulate them. Holding back tears can later lead to real nervous breakdown. It will be much more difficult to treat, since it leads to depression, and this condition often evokes thoughts of suicide.